Today marks the second anniversary of my dream of going to sleep as Robin and waking up as Stephanie coming true. Well, physically anyway! It’s been a challenging two years to say the least and I certainly didn’t expect to be still taking painkillers regularly and be looking for a surgeon to correct things from the first and second attempt.
But it is what it is and i think this is a good opportunity to look at how far I’ve come since then and my journey which in reality started in a specialist’s room on the 21st December 2015 when i at last learned about my true beginnings. I am indeed a very different person in so many ways and i owe much of this to my rock and soulmate Denise. Without her i most likely wouldn’t be here at all but i most certainly wouldn’t be the confident woman i am today. I also need to say a huge thank you to all of the people who have (and still are) looking after me medically. The five GPs who have been amazing, my psychologist, my endocrinologist, my osteopath who has been so much more for over 7 years and many more. I also would like to say a huge thank you to all our friends for their support, you have all been amazing.
My book, “When do i get to be me” is finally finished, Denise is currently proof reading it for me before it goes for editing. My grammar is not fantastic so there is lots to correct but I’m pleased with how it’s turned out and I’m happy that it will get my story and the message out.
While i am disappointed in the way the surgery has not been a complete success, the positives in terms of my happiness and contentment are there for all to see. I am also still disappointed by the few negative people who for whatever reason are not happy for me but they are thousands of kilometres away in the UK so in reality not a real issue. A major step forward over the last few months has been an acceptance of how my parents dealt with the issue of my being born intersex (or rather didn’t deal with it!) for a number of reasons i have come to terms with it with the help of ‘H’ my truely wonderful psychologist who in our six-weekly sessions never fails to ask where I’m at with them. I am so lucky to be able to still see her even though technically i am no longer bound by the agreement i made with the psychiatrist back in November 2016 that i would have counselling for at least two years.
I am also lucky in that my business has just taken off! I have two full house paints to do and lots of smaller jobs. My relationship with the Realestate company in town is wonderful, i so appreciate the work and they are very happy that they have someone who is willing to do most things and do them well. I also get to meet some truely lovely people which makes the whole thing even better.
All in all i am in a good place. Regardless of the pain i am in some days I have no regrets at all and realise just what a lucky girl i am!