Yesterday as I touched upon in my last post, a very good friend (Gary) brought his tractor equipped with a back hoe to Nannup to dig a 600 mm deep trench from the shed to the house in order to get the power across. The distance was probably not much more than twenty meters but it would have been a long and tough job to dig it by hand as the top had a very hard crust on it. Unfortunately we had a bit of a mishap with a rainwater pipe which we didn’t know was there but thankfully it was easily fixed. It was a long day as there were several other jobs which needed doing while he was there including burying some concrete which the man who did the slab left in I heap next to the wood pile. All in all it was a very satisfying day which allowed the electrician to come today to connect the power.
As my Amarok is heavier and more powerful than Gary’s Ute I offered to pick him up and tow the car trailer with the tractor on behind my car. The journey there and back gave us plenty of time to put the world to rights and talk about a number of things which are dear to us as we have very similar views on a lot of subjects. Not long after we set off home Gary came up with a very apt comment, he said to me “you really have got the best of both worlds haven’t you, when you want to you can dress up in lovely clothes, have your hair and makeup done and do girly things but you can also spend time playing with (and for want of a better word) boys toys and do all the things you used to enjoy before transitioning” he was right on the money, I certainly do have the best of both worlds in so many ways and I class myself as a bit of a hybrid because I still have most of my strength, my “think outside the box” mentality and the ability/opportunity to do lots of things that most ladies don’t. Indeed my psychologist thinks I have an unhealthy relationship with my chainsaw but for me it’s just natural. If you look up the definition of the word hybrid in a dictionary it says taking the best of two or more technologies and combining them, it’s exactly how I feel and for me it’s perfect. It makes me realise just what a lucky girl I am!
Over the last few months a number of things have combined to make a considerable improvement in my wellbeing. Two new GPs, a naturopath who I must confess I didn’t really take on my first visit but has risen incredibly in my estimations since then, the physio and his crystals and the start of a relationship with one of the local realestate companies which is working very well have all combined to make a big difference to my positivity. My psychologist has also had a good effect as in the last couple of visits we have used a slightly different method in making sure we talk about things pertinent on that day instead of getting sidetracked as often happens. Each element has made a contribution and while they might all have given a small percentage, combined they have made a big difference. It started with the first of the GPs who suggested I see the naturopath, then second GP who I went to because she has a small amount of experience with transgender patients. She has certainly looked at things in a different way to my original GP including sending me for a perineal ultrasound. This did a fantastic job of putting my mind at rest over a number of issues. Then someone else suggested I see the crystal guru and although you need a massive leap of faith I’m sure he has made an improvement in the pain I was in. The icing on the cake has been the relationship with the realestate people, I am now getting regular jobs from them which has certainly improved my self esteem and confidence. All of this has massively improved my PMA. While I have always been very much a half full girl this has boosted my mental attitude immensely. When I was in the car trade I was always the one who would find a reason to do a deal rather than a reason not to do (believe it or not I’ve worked with several people over the 32 years in the trade who would search high and low for a reason not to do a deal rather than a reason to do it which I always found bizarre!) and that attitude has helped a great deal in working through the problems I have faced over the last 18 months. The benefit of a positive mental attitude cannot be underestimated, at the moment I’m spending most of my time on the hypothetical cloud nine, very thankful for being where I am but most of all, and this is massive, thankful to all the people who have got me to this stage. My angels if you like! Most of all I am incredibly thankful to Denise, without her none of this would have been possible as I would still be Robin on the outside but with Stephanie stuck inside trying to break free of my male status. A very lucky girl indeed!